{"id":598,"date":"2009-01-05T09:30:40","date_gmt":"2009-01-05T08:30:40","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/progmanager.wordpress.com\/?p=598"},"modified":"2009-01-05T09:30:40","modified_gmt":"2009-01-05T08:30:40","slug":"2-say-thank-you-and-smile","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/realisedevelopment.net\/index.php\/2009\/01\/05\/2-say-thank-you-and-smile\/","title":{"rendered":"2. Say ‘Thank You’ and Smile…"},"content":{"rendered":"

When someone pays you a compliment.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

Most of us are lousy at taking compliments.<\/p>\n

We often\u00a0 respond by down sizing our achievements;<\/p>\n

‘Oh really it was nothing’<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

or<\/p>\n

‘I was just doing my job’.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

This down sizing achieves nothing worthwhile.<\/p>\n

First of all it negates the judgement and the goodwill of the person\u00a0 who offered you the compliments making it less likely they will compliment you in the future.<\/p>\n

Secondly it is a kind of powerful ‘self talk’ that is bad for own self image.\u00a0 We really begin to believe that our efforts were ‘nothing’ or it was JUST ‘doing my job’.<\/p>\n

So next time someone pays you a compliment just smile and say ‘Thank You’.<\/p>\n

NB: Perhaps you should get in the habit of giving more compliments too – but you may find the process discouraging as many of those you pay compliments too will react by downsizing.\u00a0 To avoid this you can tag a question onto your compliment that will prevent them from downsizing.\u00a0 So instead of saying;<\/p>\n

‘I love the hair cut.’<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

try;<\/p>\n

‘I love the hair cut.\u00a0 Where did you get it done?’.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

This trivial addition prevents downsizing and helps to get through the embarrassing seconds of silence that might otherwise follow.<\/p>\n